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  • Writer's pictureRobyn Bloom

Learning From My Past

In the past I've always wondered what would my life be like if I grew up differently. Now at the age of 45, I can honestly say that I'm grateful for my past. I've been hurt and I've hurt people. I've been a great person and a not so great person. I've lied to myself and others to make myself feel more important. I've hated my mother and now I love her. Life has taught me that the grass isn't always greener on the other side. The life that we are admiring may be toxic, ugly, and dreadful behind closed doors. The smiles we see may be hiding pain and loneliness. 

My past has taught me that I can handle the hard stuff and everyone deserves to be loved, but not necessarily by me. It has taught me that you can be so good to people, but it doesn't mean they will be good to you. It has also taught me how to be grateful for the little things and to do for others only if I can do it from the heart with no expectations. I now know that my mother did the best she could because motherhood didn't come with a manual. Most of all, I know that my bad decisions have affected my daughters and I will probably take my last breath righting my wrongs. 

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